© 2021

In touch with the world ... at home on the High Plains

Donate

Play Live Radio

Next Up:

0:00

0:00

0:00 0:00

Available On Air Stations

KJJP-FM 105.7 is currently operating at very reduced power and signal range using a back-up transmitter. This is because of complicated problems with its very old primary transmitter. Local engineers are currently working on that transmitter and consulting with the manufacturer to diagnose and fix the problems. We apologize for this disruption and service as we work as quickly as possible to restore KJPFM to full power. In the mean time you can always stream either the HPPR mix service or HPPR connect service using the player above or the HPPR app.

8 Great 'Shutdown Pickup Lines'

NPR

By Mark Memmott

Published October 1, 2013 at 11:19 AM CDT

The fun has begun.

When a government shutdown loomed in 2011, the Twitterverse had some fun with #govtshutdownpickuplines.

They're back!

Here are some of the better, slightly naughty ones we're seeing (we also also checked #shutdownpicklines):

-- "You're all the stimulus I need."

-- "I'm on furlough from the TSA. Want me to wand you?"

-- "Do you work for the government? Because you shut. it. down."

-- "Where have you been sequestered all my life?"

-- "Do you not carry health insurance? Because you've got 'fine' written all over you."

-- "My resolution continues ALL NIGHT."

-- "The IRS is suspending all audit activities. But I'll still check you out."

-- "The only thing nonessential about you are those pants."

There's also some tweeting about about #ifgovernmentshutsdown. Here's one of those:

-- "#ifgovernmentshutsdown then who's going to read my emails before me?"

Feel free to add some lines of your own in the comments thread. (Just don't go all "adult" on us, please!)

Copyright 2021 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.

Tags

NPR Top Stories

Mark Memmott

Mark Memmott is NPR's supervising senior editor for Standards & Practices. In that role, he's a resource for NPR's journalists – helping them raise the right questions as they do their work and uphold the organization's standards.

See stories by Mark Memmott

Midwest tornadoes cause severe damage in Omaha suburbs

The Associated Press

Multiple tornadoes were reported in Nebraska but the most destructive storm moved from a largely rural area into suburbs northwest of Omaha. Hundreds of homes and other structures have been damaged.
Climate activist who defaced Edgar Degas sculpture exhibit sentenced

Chloe Veltman

A federal judge sentenced Joanna Smith to 60 days in prison for smearing paint on the case surrounding Edgar Degas' Little Dancer, Aged Fourteen at the National Gallery of Art.
As bird flu spreads in cows, here are 4 big questions scientists are trying to answer

Will Stone

Health officials say there's very little risk to humans from the bird flu outbreak among dairy cattle, but there's still much they don't know. Here are four questions scientists are trying to answer.
King Charles III is returning to royal duties after his cancer diagnosis

Lauren Frayer

Buckingham Palace hasn't said what type of cancer Charles had or if he's finished treatment. It said he'll make a public visit to a cancer clinic Tuesday and will welcome Japan's emperor in June.
A baby girl born orphaned and premature after an Israeli airstrike in Gaza has died

Aya Batrawy

The newborn died after five days in an incubator. Her family was killed in an air strike. UNICEF says 13,000 children have been killed in Gaza since Oct. 7, with thousands more orphaned and wounded.